A ‘scientist’ — engaged in his employment …

A ‘scientist’ — engaged in his employment
            his employment
    And maturing his felonious little plans
            little plans
’Though he likes to interfere with your enjoyment,
            your enjoyment
    Wants a pension just like any honest man’s.
            honest man’s

Our data we with difficulty smother,
            -culty smother
    When F.O.I.* reports are to be done ;
            to be done
Ah, take one consideration with another :
            with another
    A fraudster’s lot is not a happy one.

Ah-ah …….

When F.O.I. reports are to be done, to be done,
    A fraudster’s lot is not a happy one.
            happy one

When the A.C.C.† alarmist’s not a-warming —
            not a-warming
    The carbon market closed just for the time
            for the time
He just loves to blame humanity for storming
            -ty for storming
    And listen to the cash register chime.
            -gister chime

When the fraudster’s busy fiddling the data,
            -ling the data
    He ignores the very function of the sun ;
            of the sun
But his e-mail will be found a little later,
            little later
    So the fraudster’s lot is not a happy one.

Ah-ah …….

When F.O.I. reports are to be done, to be done,
    A fraudster’s lot is not a happy one.
            happy one

* F.O.I. :  a reference to requests under the Freedom of Information Act, 2000, as amended
† Anthropogenic Climate Change (chosen to fit the metre)

My thanks to the University of Iowa Summer Opera with Jon Meadows as the Sergeant of Police — ΠΞ

15 thoughts on “A ‘scientist’ — engaged in his employment …”

  1. This kind of witty hatchet job is one of the main reasons that I keep coming back to this blog. By the way, where has my bessy pal, Melissa, been hiding her beautiful and elegant self?

  2. You know, folks, this global warming/ climate change is at least making some people rich.

    Like that failed politician Al Gore who has become a multi-millionair over night making films, writing books, giving speeches – all about global warming/ climate change!

    Blair has been also yapping about global warming AND, at the same time, investing his own money in companies that make money from… climate change!

    BBC executives are also following suit, giving more air time to global warming/ climate change scaremongers AND, at the same time, investing their own money in firms that make money from… climate change!

    Old rocker Bono has been all over the place talking about global warming/ climate change/ rain forest issues to keep his own career alive!

    Hollywood movie makers churning out blockbusters for us to enjoy i.e The Day After Tomorrow, 2012 etc… with their global warming/ climate change related global disasters stories to scare the shite out of us!

    And who can blame them for trying to make a fast buck while it lasts?

    AND least but not last: SOME folks now use the climate change excuse to carry a big reusable sack/ shopping bags with them into supermarkets, shops unchallenged by securities and help themselves to the goods unseen.

    Gone are the days when carrying an empty carry bag into shops was frowned upon. But who can blame them as a vicar has already given his blessing, declaring: The poor can shoplift as long as they only take enough for their own use and not to sell them on to make money. That is stealing.”

  3. You must pay to breath in the clean air from now on.

    Everything becomes commodity for profits, air, water, soil, etc etc. You know what, human organs and tissues should also be commodity too. Do you think they will soon open a human organs/tissues commodity market on Wall Street?

    If you need a transplant you must pay for it. Not for free anymore.

  4. htt://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/hacked-climate-science-emails

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2010/feb/03/climate-scientists-freedom-information-act

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/cif-green/2010/mar/31/hacked-climate-email-inquiry-phil-jones

    Check out the photos of those cheating, lying besterds of “scientists” at the University of East Anglia, U.K, who have been busy falsifying climate records to make people believe that there is really a climate change/ global warming, folk!

    Why are they all skinny, lanky and slimy?

    For the past 5 years, believing that there is a real global warming going, I haven’t dared break wind once, afraid that my gas would worsen the matter. Now I know that we all have been fooled by those “scientists” at the East Anglia University, I feel cheated.

    So here to the East Anglia “scientists”- “PARP” !!!!!

    Ah, that’s better!

  5. @Tony B:

    Tony B :

    Thank you for the Guardian links, which I found interesting and recommend to all. Commendations to that newspaper for its straight reporting of the subject — something we have come generally not to expect.

    (Have taken the liberty of correcting the erroneous link and removing your corrections.)

    @NickM (Counting Cats in Zanzibar):

    Not everything on this site stems from the entertaining pen of the Mayor himself. It was I that traduced the work of W.S.

    “… and the Illuminati look after the lightbulbs.” Love it.

    ΠΕΡΙΚΛΗΣ

  6. As council are going to force people to put leftover food into a separate waste plastic box ( like the blue and green recycle plastic boxes for cans, plastic etc… ), it’s a very good idea to invest your money in firms that produce these plastic recycle boxes as councils are going to buy loads and loads of them for the householders in the whole country – millions and millions plus replacements for broken ones every few years!

    Also firms that make reusable shopping bags and sacks ( of plastic, cotton or hessian ) – big money right now!

    Tony Blair and the guys at the BBC have been doing just that – investing their money in firms that benefit from the climate change ( scare ) trends.

    I don’t know why all this fuss. Whether there’s a real climate change or not, myself I just live modestly, really. I don’t buy too much food or too many new clothes, turn the lights off in rooms I’m not in etc… to save myself money and not that I care about climate change or anything really.

    You do not really have to carry a shoulder bag made from thousands of recycled Coca Cola ( copy right ) ring pulls to show the press that you care.

  7. Alas, Mel, we are booked in for an extended stay in a little Scottish town called Kirkcaldy. You may have heard of it. It’s the birthplace of some politician or another. I expect the whole gig will be about as much fun as seeing Gordon turn up at the bottom of your hospital bed on some electioneering pretext. Travel safe on the campaign trail and don’t take sweets from strange men – or advice from monkeys!

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