BBC Licence Fee
Treachery, thy name is Edmonds. After decades in which his hairy chops have been clamped about the hind teat of the BBC, Noel Edmonds has announced that he will not pay the licence fee, and I can imagine that some people will declare him a hero.Never mind that he has spent much of his adult life wallowing in the golden Pactolus of BBC light entertainment; no matter that all his grand homes were funded with the proceeds of characters such as Mr Blobby, which the BBC paid him to inflict upon the nation.
In spite of his rank ingratitude, I know that many people will spring to his defence. There will be those who think the BBC is bloated with 20,000 taxpayer-funded journalists, intrinsically likely to take a Left-liberal view of the world, and they will lift a glass to the former laird of Crinkley Bottom.
There will be many who agree with his fundamental point, that the Beeb has become bullying and intemperate in its demands for the licence fee – persecuting innocent householders with demands for £139.50, threatening to distrain their goods and send them to prison when they have never even owned a television.
To everyone who resents this state tax, when the BBC can no longer supply such basic programming as Test match cricket or rugby, Edmonds will be classed as a martyr, a Gandhi, a landmark exponent of civil disobedience.
But not to me, amigos. I think Edmonds is quite wrong, and I speak with all the vehemence of one who spent last Friday evening in a state of ecstatic rapture at the Proms. Take away the licence fee and you take away the Beeb’s ability to spend £6 million on the world’s greatest festival of classical music.
Get rid of the licence fee and you lose the vast red velvet drapes in the Albert Hall saying BBC Proms; and without the BBC Proms there would have been no frenzied Italian conductor, his spasms barely contained by the polished brass of the stand. There would have been no white-jacketed trombonists, no bare-armed female violinists.
There would have been no choir, their silvery hair like magnesium balls of fire in the TV lights, belting out Beethoven’s Ninth, the Ode to Joy, with so much crumping explosive power that it made my neck tingle.
The more I rhapsodise, of course, and the more I expand on my love of the BBC Proms, the louder I can imagine the protests.
But why do we have to pay for this, I hear you say. Why can’t it be funded by Coca-Cola, or Sky, or private subscription of some kind? To which I can only say that yes, I suppose it might be so funded. But then again it might not be. Civilisations can decline. Culture decays. The market is an imperfect preserver of heritage.
There are many moments in history when human beings have lost the understanding of some great art form, and in some cases lost it for centuries.
I want our children, my children, to know and appreciate the Ode to Joy not because it has been admired by every eccentric and demagogue from Hitler to Ian Smith (who made it the national anthem of Rhodesia) to the authors of the Lisbon Treaty on European Union.
I want children to hear it because it is – or so I assert – one of the greatest masterpieces produced in the last two centuries, a beautiful if slightly bonkers poem that gives rise to an even more beautiful melody.
Schiller’s poem is all about Joy, the lovely god-sparked daughter of paradise helping men to become brothers – obviously a good idea, on paper – and with the help of Beethoven these words are elevated into a vast, sublime manifesto for mankind.
The music lifts the poem, the poem infuses the music, and I have to admit I realised for the first time last Friday evening what proper music folk must long since have understood, that there is a complete coincidence of poetic stress and musical beat – so Beethoven must have had those words shooshing around inside his wavy-haired head before he hit on the tune.
The poem actually made the melody, I concluded, and I wished I had been taught more about it at school.
Indeed, I wished there were more music in schools generally, and that our children were taught the heart-breaking story of the Ninth Symphony, how after the first performance the composer was so deaf that he had to be turned by a violinist to face the cheers of the audience.
You can only appreciate that story if you understand the genius of Beethoven, and that means being exposed to him. That is what the Beeb is for. That is the purpose of public service broadcasting.
The BBC Proms laid on the Ninth Symphony last year to huge acclaim. They performed it again this year, and for all I care they can play it again next year.
But I accept that they can’t fill the air with nothing but classical music, and ask everyone in the country to pay for it, when there are probably quite a few people in Britain who think Beethoven was a cuddly dog in a film by Walt Disney studios.
We can’t ask the whole nation to pay for Beethoven, when some licence-fee payers really don’t give a toss about classical music. That is why the BBC has to reach out to the whole nation.
That is why it has to chase ratings and pay for Noel Edmonds and his gang. Mr Blobby, the Tweenies, Iggle Piggle, the Teletubbies: these are the essential sherpas who keep Beethoven on his summit; and by the same token, the BBC could not justify the buying and showing of a load of light entertainment that could be equally well produced by the private sector: hence the Proms, and Radio Three, and the World Service.
That is the essential symmetry. That is the best defence of the licence fee we can muster, and I think it is pretty good. Mr Blobby and Beethoven are yokemates of broadcasting destiny.
As he sits on his millions Noel Edmonds should also reflect that Mr Blobby could never have been created, and the BBC could never have paid for it, had the corporation not also invested in Ludwig van Beethoven.
[Ed: This article was first published in the Daily Telegraph on 16 September, 2008 under the heading, 'Noel Edmonds is wrong to say get rid of BBC licence fee: remove it and you lose the Proms']

Brian, you must be so proud of film director Ang Lee, who is from Taiwan. Two of his films are among my favourite films of all time, Brokeback Mountain and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. He is such a sensitive director. The only film of his I did not much like was The Hulk, he is not really the right sort of director for that subject, although he made a brave attempt.
In the closing ceremony of the Paralympics, the part with the dancers and red falling leaves was reminiscent of Ang Lee. Boris Johnson’s description of China made me long to see such a beautiful country.
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Oh, no ! Have you heard Carla Bruni sing ” Je ne t’aime plus ” ? Ace !!! Some other songs of hers are boring, though.
But now she is a president’s wife and she still makes music and sell her own CDs it looks funny, as some people said she uses her husband’s name to plug her own CDs !
I forgot to bring that threatening letter from the BBC Licencing THUGS with me here. Tomorrow OK.
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What is this Brokeback Moutain you are talking about?
You mean those photos? I clicked IMAGES above Google and asked for: PUTIN AND ALBERT HOLIDAY PICS and I saw loads of pics and they say that is Brokeback Mountain.
I googled PUTIN AND ALBERT HOLIDAY PICS and all the sites said the same: That’s is Brokeback Mountain.
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Stacey I agree. It is good she works. It does look like she is using her position to sell records. However, in France, they are laid back about a lot of things, so that is the place to get away with it. Sarkozy might like having an unconventional wife. Can you imagine here though, if Sarah Brown was strumming away and crooning “You are my heroin” about Gordon! The French are good in that they don’t pry into peoples’s private lives as much as happens over here. My French friend says Sarkozy likes the publicity though!
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Apparently Noel Edmonds has a TV licence after all. At least, that is what the BBC say, but he still says he doesn’t!
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What was Golden Pactolus applauding, the anecdote about Napoleon or Angela’s previous remark? Pactolus… that is the word that Boris used in his article, so who, may we ask, is this Golden Pactolus? Intriguing.
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It’s funny how these very short men seem to adore publicity…. Napoleon, Sarkozy…… Noel Edmonds.
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Timmy Mallett was on Andrew Neill’s show last night.
The panel seemed to agree that Gordon Brown, although not totally responsible for the present financial doom and gloom, is partially responsible and is unlikely to make it to the next election. If Harriet Harman takes over, I will leave the country.
Here is a suggestion…. Boris for President of the US as he has US citizenship and David Cameron as Prime Minister and together they can sort us out.
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Timmy Mallett was so funny, he calls his cereal Credit Crunch, well I laughed. His tips for surviving the crunch include we must remember the best things in life are free. Appreciate our friends. Have fun going downhill on a bike. Enjoy the different seasons. Do someone a good turn.
Now Labour really have to face the harshest of harsh truths.
Gordon has less ideas for surviving the credit crunch than Timmy Mallett.
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This is the threatening letter the BBC TV Licencing THUGS sent me. Please note names * and genders * have been changed to confuse the BBC Licencing THUGS :
—————————————————————-
TV Licensing http://www.tvlicensing.co.uk
DO YOU STILL NOT USE TV? OR HAS YOUR SITUATION CHANGED?
Dear Mr.Boris Johnson,
Some time ago, we were advised that no TV receiving equipment was being used to receive TV programmes at this address, and therefore no TV licence was required.
Our standard practice is to now visit your address to confirm that no type of television receiver is being used there to watch or record TV programmes as they’re being shown on TV. This includes the use of a TV set, digital box, DVD or video recorder, computer or mobile phone. Our visit should take no longer than a few minutes.
If you are still not using TV receiving equipment at this address, you needn’t take any action. Just expect a visit from us soon.
If you are not the individual named above, please don’t ignore this letter. This address still requires a licence if you are using a TV.
IF YOU NOW USE TV, YOU NEED TO BUY A TV LICENCE
If your situation has changed and you now use television, it is important that you buy a TV Licence straight away. Even if you only watch or record satellite TV which is broadcast from outside the UK, the law still requires you to have a licence. Watching or recording TV programmes without a valid licence is an offence for which you could be prosecuted and fined up to £1.000.
YOU CAN SPREAD THE COST WITH DIRECT DEBIT
If you have recently moved home, or are about to move, please let us know. You may have a TV Licence for your old address, which needs to be transferred to your new one to ensure you are licensed to use TV there. Please visit http://www.tvlicensing.co.uk or call 0844 800 6774
Yours sincerely,
Michelle Tunstall
TV Licensing Enforcement Manager
————————————————————-
So, according to the BBC Licensing THUGS:
We need to buy a BBC TV Licence to: watch Dutch hard core porno films broadcast from Holland on satellite, or even to watch your collection of DVDs and videos ?
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Angela – don’t fret, I’ve just been in hospital is all. Short reply; must recover
[Ed:
Get better soon! Glad to see you online. At least the sun has come out to welcome you home.]
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Jaq TAKE CARE! I am so glad to her from you. I do hope you make a speedy recovery, cuddle up with a nice hot cup of tea and a book by Boris Johnson; apart from his revised biography which is bound to bring a smile to your face, I recommend HAVE I GOT VIEWS FOR YOU (you have probably read them both already). xx
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Funny article in the Mail today whereby the teachers of several celebrities tell what they were like at school.
Although David Cameron was bright and enthusiastic, he apparently kept a low profile. Great picture of him as a youngster.
Jude Law was conceited and argued a lot.
Simon Cowell was a skinny, spotty youth with a tongue like a razor, even at that young age.
David Miliband didn’t get very good A Levels! He was lippy (NO!), tenacious and very Left Wing.
Boris was a scholar as Eton (extra clever) so he had to wear a white surplus, the mind boggles. He had the mop of white blond hair and looked scruffy bless him, but was entertaining and full of joie de vivre.
BORIS FOR P.M.
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Mmmm…. Boris Johnson as a small boy. I bet he tied his shoe laces to those of his friend so they both fell over, wound his sister’s plaits round the bike railings and put live frogs down girls’ knickers. Since his family brought him up nicely, maybe not, but I bet he wanted to.
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ps. He probably still wants to.
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On the Jonathan Ross show last night…. caught it in error. A huge picture of a naked Gordon Brown having a threeway with a naked Harriet Harman and I think the other lucky lady was Hazel Blears nearly falling off the bed.
For this we pay the licence fee?
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Good for Noel Edmonds in taking on the BBC licence fee bullying thugs. The King of Crinkley Bottom is leading a boycott to protest at the thuggish way the BBC collects its tax.
Here are some facts about TV Licensing, who send out those threatening letters:
- It is NOT an ” authority “. It is an admin offshoot of the BBC.
- No BBc snoop can invade your house or take statements from you under caution without a court warrant.
- And when it says ” authorisation has been granted ” for your home to be raided, authorised by whom?
Why can’t the BBC learn some manners?
Comment by FERGUS.SHANAHAN [Email address: FERGUS.SHANAHAN #AT# THE-SUN.CO.UK - replace #AT# with @ ]
Do you agree with Fergus? Join the debate at THESUN.CO.UK/COLUMNISTS
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I hear that former French president Chirac had an affair with a Japanese lady who gave birth to a boy who grew up to be a professional Sumo wrestler in Japan.
Chirac has never acknowledged this publicly, but often travels to Japan to watch these Sumo wrestling matches with his body guards. Chirac also keeps a framed photo of a giant Caucasian/ Japanese Sumo wrestler in his Paris office. In France, sexually active politicians like Chirac are thought of as macho ( ?! )
These huge Sumo wrestlers are force fed like they do geese in France to increase the size of their p… , I mean livers- sorry, joke ! I wonder if these Sumo wrestlers have ever suffered any ill health through their force feeding? Strange.
I don’t understand why if men putting it about, they are called studs. But if women do the same, they are called sluts. Men are rubbish in bed anyway !!!
Anyway, if Gordon wants to do a Chirac to sex up his dull image, he would certainly out of his depth !
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Very interesting post Stacey. CRIKEY!!
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Jonathan Ross, can’t you update your humour? It doesn’t take a lot of brains to be merely smutty.
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Fergus, the problem is, the BBC are not the only body to adopt such an aggressive approach to unpaid bills. Lots of comanpies do it. There is an Act that forbids this, but obviously nobody is enforcing it. MORE REGULATION is required.
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It’s never a good idea to refuse to pay bills, that is not the answer to unfairness. Noel Edmonds should not do this, because he has benefitted hugely through the BBC, he could start a campaign, but to encourage non-payment is irresponsible.
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Fergus, do we know for sure that events you describe have actually happened? Is there documented evidence?
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It’s good that Boris’s article has drawn attention to the problem anyway.
For the record, the second lady enjoying Gordon Brown’s favours on the Jonathan Ross show was Margaret Beckett.
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BBC4 does put on good programmes, there is one on tonight on Robert Kennedy Junior. The channel is very good on American politics and history.
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The worst thing about the BBC now is the way they have lost most of the sport. The BBC’s sport’s coverage used to be excellent and a major reason to watch the channel. No longer.
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Billy, Brokeback Mountain is a famous film direced by Ang Lee and it won the oscar for Best Film, i think, 3 years ago.
Sorry I didn’t answer you before. it is also a range of mountains in Wyoming.
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My take on the BBC and many other things is very simple what is my cost per hour of entertainment and the BBC comes out pretty close to the best value.
Take the hours you watch TV, listen to the radio or check the website and its amazing value, innovative and for the most part still trusted and more impartial.
I would like to think that I have a wide range of interests and so hopefully a balanced view but the BBC is an amazing organisation and I would like to see it evolve through investment not starved of cash.
(Just take the Olympic games, great coverage from a City halfway around the world, the wildlife programmes, programes about Britain, current and foreign news, the website is amazing and ahead of most others and finally whether you like Radio 1,2,3,4 or 5 Live there is nearly always something to enjoy.)
So when a night in an average London hotel is £150 let us support a great British institution that costs less than that and gives us so much back.
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The BBC coverage of the Olympics and the Paralympics was amazing. Hugely enjoyable, first class.
The childrens programmes on the BBC are also very good.
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It’s a matter of ethics.
People should pay for what they use. If they watch the BBC, they should pay for the BBC (assuming the BBC wishes to continue sans advertising). This is fine – and so the BBC is right so chase up those who do watch and don’t pay. It’s no different to selling someone a pint of milk and them not paying for it.
What IS wrong, however, is that the current arrangement is actually “watch *any* TV and pay for the BBC”.
What if I never watch the BBC because it has no programmes I like? why on earth am I required by law – the law of the State, the law of the land, the same law which puts people in jail for crime – to pay for their running costs?
It’s completely unethical that a company has shanghied the law of the land into forcing everyone who watches TV to pay for its costs!
The problem here though is that the BBC broadcasts itself over the entire country, unencoded, and so argues that anyone with a TV *could* watch the BBC.
I don’t have much sympathy for this. The *BBC* chooses its business model. It chooses to broadcast for free. Arguing then that anyone *could* receive it so *everyone* must pay is entirely disingenuous. It means they have a broken business model and the law of the land is being used to make it function.
The basic ethical fact is – if I have a TV and I don’t watch the BBC, I should NOT be paying for the BBC. It doesn’t matter how much *you* like them, or how much *you* think they produce excellent material and news and so on – you STILL don’t have ANY right to FORCE me to pay for it when *I* don’t like it and *I* don’t watch it.
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Ros, I can confirm that some readers have complained to me ( their names, addresses and emails were supplied ) about the way the BBC TV Licensing thugs bullies harassing them. The rude BBC TV Licensing letter which Stacy re-typed here is the genuine standard letter those readers received, too.
Right on, Blank Xalver !!! Your point is exactly what everybody who doesn’t want to watch BBC programmes has said before.
Please join our debate on BBC Licensing at THESUN.CO.UK/COLUMNISTS
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Too right, Blank Xalver ! The BBC could broadcast their programmes encoded if they wanted to but that would have shown how many people actually watch the BBC and how much less money they would have made through TV licensing !
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Mr. Noel Edmonds, people here have argued for you and against you. It would be great if you would post an opinion, we would all love to read your take on all this.
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Angela, if you go to http://www.accessinterviews.com then type NOEL EDMONDS and click Search on their site, you will see lots of Noel Edmonds’s interviews given to papers over the years.
Please read his two most recent interviews – 13 and 14 September 2008 ( at the top of the page ). Very remarkable and frank- straight to the point.
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Thank you for this, Stacy!.
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Read Jeremy Clarkson’s column regarding hazel blears and I could not agree more! This woman has a built in autocue and cannot ad lib this creates an explosion as you scream at the television for the nauseating little nobody to “answer the ****ing question”. No matter how many times she is asked she simply starts with “as I said” and carrys on with the inane drivel that no one in their right mind believes.
She should be banned as ‘a serious public health problem’.
As I write and think about her I feel like stabbing myself in the eye with the pen lying to my right. Woman disappear with your boy friend my guess of the seven it is dopey.
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Noel doesn’t object to the BBC licence fee or try to justify how it’s spent. He objects to fierce anti-social adverts designed to frighten people. He has made it VERY clear that he likes and admires the BBC and believes such negative campaigning unjustified. His attitude … the BBC is very good value and should say so … not try to terrorise the paying public.
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Well I’m a master at singing theme tunes from Cebeebies due to having two children under three.
No license and they’d have to watch commercial TV on Saturday and that’s just terrible for young children to watch.
Coming from 25 years in Australia I can comment with remote perspective that the BBC is one of the few GOOD things the UK has to offer (as well as your good self Mr Johnson) so I for one have no issue with paying the fee.
Although note the lack of breaks during programming makes toilet stops an issue (for the kiddies and me).
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Boris
You are a Bunteresque bloated Buffoon, whose total lack of any talent encourages you to protect the vested interests of the corrupt systems that protect the mediocre council expenses scroungers like yourself.
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After the spectacle of the Ross Brand affair which has exposed a culture at the BBC completely lacking in accountabilty, it is now time for us to show our support for Noel Edmonds by boycotting the BBC license fee en masse.
I don’t really care if the BBC wishes to experiment in “edgy” comedy, cry for the end of capitalism or call anyone to the right of Hillary Clinton a fascist. What I do object to is being forced to pay their salaries.
The BBC license fee is an extortion racket.
<a href=”http://boycottthebbclicencefee.wordpress.com/2008/10/29/6-million-per-annum/”Join the campaign to boycott the BBC license fee
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the difrence being the blobby suit cost 60 quid the proms cost 6 million.
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Please comment Boris on whether the BBC is operating within the requirements of its charter, especially with respect to political bias and lewd broadcasts by Jonathan Ross and others. I believe that the BBC is failing in its public duty to uphold high standards of broadcasting, while appreciating that this may be a topic for dispute. I have cancelled my DD and do not intend to pay a licence fee on principle until this matter is resolved. Entirely agree about music, and I also enjoy R4, but these do not require a £139 tax.
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The likes of terrorist Qatada should be sued by relatives and survivors of the atrocities carried out by the terrorists. The payment by the Human Rights Panel is a mockery of innocent peoples Human Rights to live a safe life.
Once someone takes away anothers Right for a safe and peaceful life then they should pay with their Rights being removed leaving them nothing to hide behind.
What on Earth are our politicians doing to earn their extortionate pay? David Cameron is right when he says we should tear up tyhe European Human Rights Bill and have the British Human Rights Bill. Stand up you gutless politicians and fight for the safety of the British peoples.
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No ‘leapords don’t change their spots’ My son was killed by an IRA bomb in London so you can imagine my disgust at Edward Kennedy receiving a knighthood, Barak Obama dining Gerry Adams in the White House – Come on you Americans – no excuse now for your ignorance – you’ve dug your own dead out of the rubble following a terrorist attack so you know what it’s like – stop courting these murderers – the Knighthood has just cost Brown my vote (if he ever had it).
It’s well documented how much the Kennedys (led by old man Joe) hated us and I’ve seen no evidence of that having changed.
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Pensioners should not have to pay the licence fee.
We retire at 65 or must we pay to keep these people and
their huge salaries and pensions .Also who draws up the
contracts for Ross etc.Do they get a bonus the more they
pay them.?
Yes i would like these big fat cats at the bbc sorted out.
DONT FORGET ITS OUR CASH THEY ARE SPENDING THE SAME AS OUR
SO CALLED MPS ?.MR BROWN COULD STOP SIR FREDS PENSION/BONUS
FOR BEING INEFFICIENT(ITS STRAIGHT FORWARD) HAS HE GOT THE GUTS?LETS NOT FORGET SIR FRED.
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Can we sack all the MP’s including the North East hating tory party and their wisteria trimming, two faced con man of a leader, David I’ll say anything to get votes Cameron.
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ur not allways right gaunty, u might not like griffin, but, everyone has a right to rep[resent us how they feel, and, a lot of people are agreeing with griff at the moment, a lot,.
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Why do they call it a licence fee anyway. It is just a BBC Tax – plain and simple.
The difference between a licence and a tax is the – Pay as you wish use. I mean a licence is a purchase to use a product or service. A tax is a mandatory contribution by law by all or qualifying citizens.
Well, I have got SKY at home that I decided to buy and pay for – so please take away the BBC (I dont want it) but forcing me to pay a tax for something I dont want to use is wrong.
Please call this licence the BBC tax.
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Interesting . So you are pro bbc. You think I’m fooled by all that twaddle about The Proms. It doesn’t pay politicians to get on the wrong side of the bbc. I’m not going to waste my time writing much here. It would be like writing to the bbc and expecting them to publish my opinion and I know the truth would not help their cause one bit. I will write more about this interesting discovery at the facebook group 10 million for no “TV” licence. The inverted commas are mine.
But I do copy and paste these comments I make. That’s one nice advantage of the internet over the days when there was only tv and “points of view”.So it does make it harder to cover up the truth and it won’t be long now before we’re not forced to subsidise your wonderful nights at the bbc Proms and we can choose to watch the stuff that only appeals to the lowest common denominator .
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How the hell does an ad for Ken Livingstone’s Fight for something or other at only £6 per head end up here [Ed: moderated]?
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