Sex sells. The problem is not those who write the articles but those who read them and take them as more than the moralising hypocracy they are.

As for BB, it would go away if people STOPPED WATCHING!

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“We roundly condemn the publication of these shocking pictures. To help readers make up their own minds, here they are…”

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The very embodiment of this kind of delusional mentality is to be found in our present Prime Minister, who has convinced himself that Iraq is now, largely thanks to him, an almost fully functional democracy with the trains running on time. He also imagines himself to be wildly popular as he once was, and is currently engaged on what seems a never-ending TV farewell tour, dispensing nuggets of wisdom wherever he goes. But is he really going? If so, is he really the Prime Minister? Or is he simply allowed out of Number 10 to give speeches, while the real decisions are taken by others with a firmer grip on reality?

He is not, unfortunately, the only delusional MP in parliament. There seem to be quite a few of them. Who knows how many there might be? Hundreds?

The whole spectacle has an air of pervasive unreality about it, as if we were all living inside a fiction, only with our belief suspended, and watching the clock. It will only end when Blair finally steps down, grins and waves on the steps of Number 10, before climbing into the limo that will take him to Neverland.

But when he has gone, how will be sure he has gone? The longer this goes on, the longer it will take for anyone to believe that he has gone. One will have to pinch oneself for days and weeks afterwards.

Many pundits predict that he will be gone in weeks. The same pundits were saying the same thing months ago, and they were wrong. There is said to be a ‘timetable’. But has anyone seen it? Perhaps it has been lost. Or perhaps it describes an imaginary series of events, like a railway timetable. Who knows? All I know is that I don’t.

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Is it an offence to possess an imaginary pistol? Or is it just an offence to actually fire such an imaginary pistol at a (possibly) imaginary politician? Was anyone hit by imaginary bullets? Are they being treated for imaginary gunshot wounds? Has the imaginary pistol been found and traced? How many imaginary pistols are there in the country anyway? Should there be an amnesty during which owners of imaginary pistols are encouraged to hand them in at police stations? Do the police have ways of disposing of imaginary pistols? Is there a danger that children will graduate from imaginary pistols to imaginary machine guns in a spiral of imaginary mayhem and violence? Should the police be armed with imaginary rifles to defend themselves against kids with imaginary pistols? Is there a danger of imaginary weapons falling into the hands of imaginary terrorists? Is this why there are so many imaginary tanks parked around our imaginary parliament in Westminster? Shouldn’t these imaginary tanks be shipped to Afghanistan, where they can be used to fight imaginary enemies? And with all these imaginary tanks rolling up and down our streets, isn’t there a danger of imaginary tank traffic jams? Do imaginary tank engines idling in imaginary traffic jams emit imaginary carbon dioxide causing imaginary global warming? How much imaginary carbon dioxide is there in the atmosphere already? Does imaginary carbon dioxide mix readily with real carbon dioxide? Or is there some sort of explosion, which generates combined real imaginary carbon dioxide? Is real imaginary carbon dioxide a contributor to real global warming, or just to imaginary global warming? Should we worry more about imaginary global warming than real global warming, or should we be more worried about the imaginary terrorists with their imaginary pistols? Or should I not worry too much, and leave it all to our imaginary climate scientists and our imaginary police? Why do imagina…

I’ve been awake all night with such imaginings. Or did I just imagine seeing that news report in the first place?

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