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The essence of the Tory approach is that there are still plenty of ways of beautifying the world and sparing the taxpayer

Fed up with feeble Labour? Only you can put the boot in

Not so long ago, there appeared in these pages one of the best letters I have ever seen. It was a letter from a retired lieutenant-colonel. I have a feeling he lived in Gloucestershire and, even without having his precise words to hand, I can still feel the incandescent heat of his indignation.

It was one of those letters that smelt of the freshly spilt coffee and still echoed to the sound of the freshly smacked breakfast table. You could almost hear the air coursing from his nostrils in a great double-barrelled parp of rage that sent the crumbs of egg and toast scattering from his moustache, over the discarded edition of the morning paper and into the lilac-scented lap of his adoring wife of 50 years.


He spoke with the authentic voice of Telegraph man and, like so many Telegraph men, he spoke for England. “Sir,” he said (and if I paraphrase or abbreviate, I hope he will forgive me), “isn’t it time the Tory party stopped pretending to be some namby-pamby crochet club?”, and he went on to wring the withers of the Opposition before kicking it smartly in the fetlocks and slapping it in the girth.

He didn’t want any more of this bunny-hugging nonsense. He didn’t want this green what-have-you. He didn’t want to see any more of Her Majesty’s oh-so-loyal Opposition poncing about on bikes. He wanted to see this Labour lot turfed out on their ear. He wanted to see Tory MPs fix bayonets and close with the enemy; or, failing that, he wanted the Government swiftly decapitated with a sharpened shovel. So would the Tories kindly cease their obsession with organic marrows and solar power and get on with opposing, which, after all, was what the taxpayer was paying them to do.

As soon as I read that letter, I not only felt a surge of pleasure at the splendour and violence of the lieutenant-colonel’s language, I also knew that across Britain thousands of Telegraph readers would be gurgling assent, pounding their own tables with approval and immediately firing off sympathetic e-mails to whichever Old Rectory in Gloucestershire he inhabited.

That brilliant correspondent had contrived, in his cosmic yawp of irritation, to express the growing sense of unreality that is felt by the voters at large. Here we have a government in a state of Babylonian decadence, with three of the most senior ministers teetering on the brink of a richly deserved oblivion. After nine years, the Blair administration would seem to lie on its back like a wounded beetle, feelers feebly waggling, and yet the Tory party seems unable to bring down the gumboot of fate.

How come they are still there, people want to know. How can Charles Clarke possibly remain in office after he has allowed more than 1,000 foreign criminals to roam the streets when they should have been deported, and when those criminals have now been shown to have used their time at large to commit further sickening crimes, including rape and, it is now suspected, the murder of a police officer?

All I can say to the lieutenant-colonel is that I know how he feels, that Opposition is deeply frustrating, and that he, and everyone who agrees with him, has their very own chance, today, to put their boots in, to vote Labour out wherever they can, and do themselves what we Tories are unable to do, since the physical task of removing the ruling party from power is left to the people and the people alone.

Of course it is maddening to see Clarke and Patricia Hewitt still clinging to power; but if anything their performance is now an electoral advantage to the Tories. And as for John Prescott, there seems no point in the Opposition trying to elaborate on the magnificent efforts of the Mail, a newspaper that pays hundreds of thousands of pounds for smut and then snarls with splendid disapproval of the pornography it has procured. What could anyone hope to add?

I urge the lieutenant-colonel to be of good cheer, and to vote Tory, because I also think there is some misunderstanding of the great green Tory transformation.

There are two ways of thinking about the environment, and taking an interest in the future of the planet. The first is to be endlessly steeped in moral disapproval, to dislike growth, spending, Ferraris, Solero ice-creams and everything that makes life worth living.

These sorts of greens don’t really care about the environment, or at least they don’t primarily care about the environment. Like those who oppose hunting, they are really actuated by hatred of the mental states of others. They want to parade their consciences, to control and to inhibit.

That is not the Tory approach – or at least not as I understand it. We don’t believe that you have to live on tofu and rear goats in order to be good to the environment. We are optimists, and we believe that there are more solutions in technology and progress than in mass self-denial and new regulation, and that you can still aspire to drive a Ferrari, except that one day it will be a beautiful clean green Ferrari powered by a hydrogen fuel cell developed in the labs of South Oxfordshire.

We don’t want to coerce and constrain; we want to help people in their very natural desire to improve the world around them, and sometimes you can achieve this by removing controls, not imposing them.

Every morning I come out of my house and am bathed by a great horrible gust of gas-smelling vapour from the boiler. Wouldn’t it be better if there were no planning restrictions on the completely inoffensive solar panels I want to install; and wouldn’t it be a good thing if these panels consequently became far more affordable for everyone?

The essence of the Tory approach is that there are still plenty of ways of beautifying the world and sparing the taxpayer. Tory councils have done it up and down the country. Vote Blue, go Green, save money.

181 Comments

  • At 2006.05.08 20:25, Thalia said:

    Semi-intelligent tubes of smarties could only be an improvement.

    Green policies are always sidelined because they are long term by definition- no fast buck politically or any other way usually. However, before you know it, the long term is here, the ice fields are melting and we’re all up to our arses in water. Quite a lot of London is sort of on a flood plain I understand.

    I would like to see technology, of which we are already quite capable, used to produce really efficient solar panels I can stick on my roof and two fingers to London Energy and their skyrocketing bills. I would have a bore hole in my garden for water as my father does (where it not for the fact that the groundwater in the aforementioned Thames flood-plain area is rather dodgy) so I could say two fingers to Thames Water’s even more highly skyrocketing prices and their hose-pipe ban (and why are we not getting a discount in our rates as they are not providing the service we are paying for and we are all supposed to stand by and let our much loved gardens die while Thames Water pressure wash their windows?
    Not to mention the leaks.
    I understand the leaks at least keep the street trees alive)

    In the short term I too am far more worried by the fact I can’t get the healthcare I need, or proper services of pretty much any sort, whilst paying sky high taxes and insurance’s for shoddy products, but I still want to see nice proper cars running on alternative fuels instead of iniquitous “congestion charges” (which seem to actually generate more congestion without noticeable improvement in air quality) and ever increasing petrol charges for a smelly, dangerous fuel.
    I would like to see as much consumer independence of large scale power monopolies as is humanly possible. I would like to see the end of the terms “consumer” or “customer” for that matter and an admission that we are actually people, not sheep to be fleeced, even when we do behave like it.

    It’s better for the environment. It’s better for us and it’s better for our children, if any.

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    • At 2006.05.08 20:34, jaq said:

      And your point is????
      We should perhaps be the ‘Nanny’ state for all the world?
      Accomodate them all when they get sick of their own country for whatever reason maybe?
      One problem with that I’ve always thought: we are a tiny little island, how are we going to fit them all in eventually?

      Maybe the work of Stanley Johnson should be given another look and the powers that be pay more attention to the global birth trends and control. Especially in HIV swamped countries.
      I know I may sound trite to some of you but those who know me better know it’s a genuine suggestion. The work of Stanley Johnson is always worth a look

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      • At 2006.05.08 23:03, Martyn said:

        All this aside, why, why, why did Sven not name Bozzer in his World Cup Squad. Just the kind of midfield enforcer we’re crying out for in Germany.

        Draft Johnson ! Join the campaign, build the movement !

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        • At 2006.05.08 23:34, jaq said:

          Soz, I was replying to manxcat, Thalia surged in there while I wasn’t looking.

          I loathe football – good to see Boz is employing Blairite tactics: say you’re going to do something (like play football) then do something completely different and if anyone notices, hold up your hands and wait for the enquiry.

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          • At 2006.05.09 08:34, manxcat said:

            Jaq – trying to get the rich nations – not just the UK – to help those people facing disease and death in Africa isn’t the same as letting them all in to our little island – your attempt to ratchet one idea up to imply the other is a trick of the BNP and similar groups around Europe. My point is that Cameron would not have the nerve to take the position on Africa held by charitable souls such as Steven L and yourself – and maybe good old Boris, though who knows what he really believes about anything, although we do know that he admires the political insights of retired Lieutenant-Colonels in the Home Counties. And I’m sure they are of one mind with you on this one…

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            • At 2006.05.09 09:22, Macarnie said:

              If this country’s resources had been properly husbanded, i.e. used to its proper and full potential during the time that this Government has been in power ,( and please ,not once again, the pointless exhumation of that old and long dead chestnut about Black Friday ,bad though it was), and not been wasted in showy gestures of pouring money into an unprepared hole or holes, (the walls and floors of which had not been designed to contain the influx, so it drained away), this country might well be in a position to play sugar daddy to the potentate exploited countries of sub Saharan Africa .

              Perhaps we might even have had the resources, and to spare, to support one illegal war, prepare clandestinely for the possibility of yet another, whilst, astoundingly enough, at the same time, somewhat reducing the sufferings of some of our own most needy people. By these, I do not mean those, who like leeches, exist on the fruits of other people’s endeavours; rather I mean those genuinely in need of temporary, and yes, sometimes even permanent, help from society.

              If your inclination is to ignore the status quo, regardless of how far into a political morass it is driving this country, so be it —-your choice, but allow other people to have their own views on the subject so obviously close to your heart. =Charity begins at home, and then, if the spirit of charity is still alive and kicking, ( and privately Brits give more, and more frequently , than any other Nation, I hear, based on individual donations. ,
              When it comes to Charity —–Apres nous , le deluge.

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              • At 2006.05.09 09:28, jaq said:

                It is a perennial mistake to underestimate the value of the “political insights of retired Lieutenant-Colonels in the Home Counties”. Quite often you find that not only are they older but wiser too.

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                • At 2006.05.09 10:12, manxcat said:

                  In my experience they are certainly older, but the ones of my acquaintance(including a charming ex-Gurkha officer, it must be said) are no wiser than retired dustbinmen or retired bank clerks – unless you think fantasies of military coups and wholesale floggings of wayward youth the pinnacle of wisdom, that is.

                  And, might I add, Black Wednesday is far from being an old chestnut. It lost the Tories the election in 97, and the memory of true blue economic mismanagement lived on through two more elections – given that Labour won their third term just a year ago, largely based on voters’ satisfaction with the economy combined with a suspicion that the Tories were still a hopeless bunch of tossers, I’d say it’s as relevant now as when the boys in blue were chucked out 9 years ago. For all your claptrap about a failed economy, the Tories still have to prove that they aren’t the party of economic incompetence… and that problem dates directly from Black Wednesday.

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                  • At 2006.05.09 10:21, jaq said:

                    manxcat – perhaps you just weren’t paying attention to the older gentlemen. I can’t say in life I agree with everybody but I’ve usually found people have something interesting to say, if you listen.

                    Labour won their third term with about 25% voting was it? England certainly voted for Conservative in the majority but the specific redrawing of boudaries and skewed voting practice ensured that Bliar, by all his inventive tactics, got in for a third term.

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                    • At 2006.05.09 11:01, manxcat said:

                      Ah, the unfairness of the first-past-the-post system. It’s strange how people always reach for that one when they don’t like who’s won. Labour tried it under Thatcher,the Lib Dems try it every day of the week. But the argument has always been that it’s the bedrock of our stable political life. And if only 25% of people bother to vote, then so be it – the other 75% have also made a political decision by abstaining, or just being bloddy apathetic. We could of course plump instead for proportional representation, like our good friends on the continent – it’s the basis of excellent government in places like Italy, and that nice Herr Hitler certainly benefited from it…

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                      • At 2006.05.09 12:00, Macarnie said:

                        The one thing anyone learns from having ones chestnuts burnt, is to get them quickly out of the fire .

                        As for the first past the post system of Government. we have it for good or ill , your choice .

                        No result is really conclusive, when only a minority choose to get off their butts and vote. What is more,nothing is more nauseating than to have to listen to those who did not vote, crowing happily how much they think that voting is a waste of time . There is no such thing as a free breakfast.

                        Let’s, for a change have the first past the post system used to elect an ENGLISH Parliament. Then it will be seen how many of the increasingly voracious breed of Pauls are still left crowing.

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                        • At 2006.05.09 12:18, manxcat said:

                          And in whose manifesto at the next election do you think the issue of an English Parliament, first-past-the-post or otherwise, will be raised? The blue smarties? They were opposed to the parliaments in Scotland and Wales, and hate the idea of even more government, so are they about to do a volte face and go for an English one? I think not. The red smarties? They’ve had their fingers burned so much over English regional parliaments they’re no longer up for it. The yellow smarties? Well, they haven’t a chance of winning anyway… Tell us, how do you think this English parliament is going to come about?

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                          • At 2006.05.09 13:15, Macarnie said:

                            Your rhetorical question in re. English Parliament, is ,as are all such questions, posed without the remotest expectancy of a reply.

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                            • At 2006.05.09 13:35, manxcat said:

                              The last question wasn’t rhetorical – “Tell us, how do you think this English parliament is going to come about?” It’s a direct question. Given that the main political parties in the UK haven’t the stomach for such a policy, I’m keen to know how you think your call for a first-past-the-post system for an English parliament is actually going to be realised.

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                              • At 2006.05.09 13:53, Macarnie said:

                                It will not ,in all probability, ever come about . This is due to the Labour Party’s insistence that we already have a perfectly adequate one in Westminster, (Gordon Brown said so,quite recently), coupled with the insistence of the other parties that we have too many subdivisions in the form of parliaments elsewhere already.

                                An earlier, fairly recent thread dealt with this subject more than adequately, so despite there being grass roots support for said ghostly or imaginary Parliament,
                                ” Nichts zu machen”

                                I shall henceforth not be able to reply to this or any other point , for some considerable time. I am booked into a hospital bed later this afternoon. Hopefully : auf Wiedersehen irgendwann.

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                                • At 2006.05.09 14:10, manxcat said:

                                  So the Campaign for an English Parliament and all that sort of talk was merely so much balderdash. Glad we cleared that one up. Just remember,aus so krummem Holze, als woraus der Mensch gemacht ist, kann nichts ganz gerades gezimmert werden.
                                  All the best.

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                                  • At 2006.05.09 14:58, Macarnie said:

                                    Vielleicht deswegen haben wir so ein ‘schoenen’ krummen Kabinett

                                    Wenn ich so ein Zimmermann noetig haben sollte ….. danke schoen!

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                                    • At 2006.05.09 16:17, Melissa said:

                                      Vicus

                                      Re: The Legends Football Match

                                      At last news about the charities! Here is the message from the organiser:

                                      I’m sorry I haven’t got back to you sooner – we’ve had problems with our emails!

                                      This is great news about donations and I’m sure our two charities will be extremely pleased.

                                      Both The British Red Cross and The Bobby Moore Fund were our equal charities and their contact details are:

                                      The British Red Cross
                                      Attn: Anna Mothes (Corporate Partnerships Executive)
                                      UK Office
                                      44 Moorfields
                                      London
                                      EC2Y 9AL
                                      020 7877 7102
                                      amothes [Email address: amothes #AT# redcross.org.uk - replace #AT# with @ ]
                                      http://www.redcross.org.uk

                                      The Bobby Moore Fund (Cancer Research UK)
                                      Attn: Rosie Hall (National Events Manager)
                                      Cancer Research UK
                                      PO Box 123
                                      London
                                      WC2A 3PX
                                      020 7009 8892
                                      rosie.hall [Email address: rosie.hall #AT# cancer.org.uk - replace #AT# with @ ]
                                      http://www.bobbymoorefund.org
                                      Registered charity No. 1089464

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                                      • At 2006.05.09 17:14, Jaq said:

                                        In the hope you’ll see this before you go Mac, just wanted to say best luck. Hope to see you back on the keyboard soon.

                                        Jaq

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                                        • At 2006.05.09 18:59, raincoaster said:

                                          Good luck Mac, come back soon. It’s quite obvious you need medical treatment: you’ve lapsed into German! Seek treatment immediately.

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                                          • At 2006.05.09 22:40, PaulD said:

                                            Mac: Good luck in your confinement and remember:

                                            Herr Wagner arbeitet in einem bureau. Die mutter arbeitet zu hause und Hans und Gerte in der garten. Am eins oder am halb zwei kommen die kinder aus der Schule und gehen nach hause.

                                            (The only thing I learnt from German O-level. Useful for doing Hitler impressions).

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                                            • At 2006.05.10 09:38, Melissa said:

                                              Mac

                                              We need you to return to full health soon and hope for a speedy recovery.

                                              Look forward to hearing your next bulletin very soon.

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                                              • At 2006.05.10 15:47, Steven L said:

                                                Manxcat,

                                                The British public give very generously to charity. I’m all for government encouraging this, especially through tax incentives, encouraging people to do voluntary work in the developing world, encouraging us to develop new products that will help the developing world etc.

                                                Do you really think that the government donating on our behalf all the time encourages people to donate themselves?

                                                Do you really think that the policy of getting young people in horrendous debt and trapping them here is helping voluntary organisations get more young volunteers (whose backs are still up to digging and carrying etc) to go to the developing world, get their hands dirty and help?

                                                I’m all for us awarding grants to people in the developing world to study nursing and medicine here, but do you really think that poaching them to practice nursing and medicine here after they are qualified and trained is helping the developing world?

                                                Do you really think throwing £billions at African dictators like Mugabe is going to help stuggling families in the developing world?

                                                There are pregnent women in Zinbabwe swimming across crocodile infested rivers to get away from him. How many more African leaders will turn the way of Mugabe if we just dish money to them?

                                                Helping the developing world is best done by ordinary people in rich Western countries, encouraged by Western governments, doing things that directly help ordinarty people in the developing world.

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                                                • At 2006.05.10 16:42, Steven L said:

                                                  OK, I’m gonna have to be careful what I say but everyone who doesn’t find four letter words offensive should look at this.

                                                  Type a seven letter swearword (the first four letters are the ‘f’ word the last three ‘wit’) into google and hit ‘I’m feeling lucky’

                                                  Those guys at google sure have a good sense of humour.

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                                                  • At 2006.05.10 19:53, manxcat said:

                                                    A pretty incoherent rant. Are you a student by any chance? On a student loan, perhaps? Try to look beyond yourself and stop equating student debt with the plight of the Third World. And don’t think pregnant women, crocodiles and Mugabe are the sort of mix that negates the value of helping nations that don’t have the benefit of the great wealth of the Brits – like other comments I’ve seen here, that’s the type of emotive claim popular with some of the most unpleasant political groups around Europe. I’m sure the BNP would be delighted to have it on their next manifesto…

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                                                    • At 2006.05.10 22:17, PaulD said:

                                                      Steven: Your Google tip took me to a site I’ve never seen before – the Prime Minister’s website. Fascinating.

                                                      For a start:

                                                      Tony Blair set up the Commission in 2004 to examine womens’ work experiences, the pay gap and the barriers affecting career progression.

                                                      If she worked for me, one barrier that might affect her progression is an inability to use apostrophes.

                                                      Anyway, the site is worth a look

                                                      pm.gov.uk/output/Page8809.asp

                                                      (address starts with a www. which I have omitted because Boris’s forum seems to bounce any post containing a link. Melissa?).

                                                      The PM’s site has “initiatives” coming at us like a tsunami – and these are only the “big issues”! Are we supposed to be impressed? I am left overwhelmed, bewildered, angry at the abuse of my money, and wondering if we human beings are allowed to sort out any of life’s problems without the consent of New Labour.

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                                                      • At 2006.05.10 22:52, Psimon said:

                                                        ATTENTION ALL!!!!

                                                        As the more perceptive of you may have noticed, this government (i use the term loosely – pathetic dictatorial corrupt a***wipes is more appropriate) have BANNED all protest within a kilometre of Parliament. Boris himself almost fell foul of this on the recent C.H.A.N.T. march.

                                                        This law was brought in to end the protest of just one man; Brian Haw.

                                                        Brian has been protesting against the Iraq war since the very outset. His presence is a constant embarrassment to Bliar, so our murdering meddling PM had a law enacted just to get rid of him.

                                                        Mr Haw appealed (and won) against this law. The government have just had this appeal overturned.

                                                        Is it any wonder that people no longer take an interest in politics when the government goes out of its way to illegitamise any opposition or protest?

                                                        I ask all readers of this post to contact their MPs at the soonest possible opportunity, protesting against the murder of democracy by this self-serving and corrupt bunch of thieving murderous war-mongering c***s who call themselves The Labour Party, our government.

                                                        I have spent my life as a peacable citizen…but give me a rifle and i will shoot that bastard Blair. Not between the eyes (they are too close together – besides, his brains are clearly in his ar*e), but somewhere that will guarantee a slow and painful death.

                                                        He steals freedoms, orders the deaths of hundreds of thousands of innocent men women and children, and smiles whilst he does it. And we let him get away with it.

                                                        So, tell your representatives that we have a RIGHT to protest, and the seat of power should not be immune as a venue. Only a cowardly murderous liar need hide. As only a cowardly murderous liar IS hiding – in his anti-democratic protest-free zone.

                                                        GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

                                                        BASTARDS!!!!!!!!!

                                                        (rant over…anyone got a large towel i can borrow to clear up all the vitriol and spittle that appears to be drenching my keyboard?)

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                                                        • At 2006.05.11 05:23, raincoaster said:

                                                          Psimon, good to have you back!

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                                                          • At 2006.05.11 08:45, manxcat said:

                                                            Psimon, you old c***, what are you on about? Whose deaths did he ‘order’? The Iraqis’? It was interesting to hear the Conservative leader talking on last year’s pre-election Question Time on the BBC. When pushed, he said he’d have gone in with the Americans even if he’d known there were no WMDs. He was even more gung-ho than your pal Bliar. Would he have prevented the deaths of those innocent Iraqis? Doesn’t sound like it. And what of the MP for Henley. He voted for war and death to rain down upon the young and the innocent as well as Saddam and his henchmen. He may wobble a little now when it’s turned nasty, but where was he when it mattered? Would he have saved the hundreds ‘ordered’ to their deaths by Bliar? Howard, Johnson and the whole bunch of them were in thrall to big George W Bush; they loved his swaggering style. Read Johnson’s sycophantic comments on Bush’s rejection of the Kyoto Treaty – gosh, how he admires that mean ol’ boy from Texas and his disregard for world opinion – the same disregard shown in Iraq, in fact. No, when you take out your rifle, Psimon old chap, bring along a few hundred extra bullets for the other ‘criminals’…

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                                                            • At 2006.05.11 12:12, Psimon said:

                                                              Manxcat: Just keep the rifle loaded for me, i’ll keep on with the shooting…

                                                              ;o)

                                                              But the point was more about the fact that protest has been banned…and i want to protest against that!

                                                              Raincoaster: Thank you very much. I don’t have a net connection at home anymore, as i am too poor to afford it right now. If the economy is doing as well as our illustrious chancellor says, how come there are no blooming jobs round here and an increase in people out of work? Looks like someone in the labour party is lying again….

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                                                              • At 2006.05.12 12:58, raincoaster said:

                                                                And if they’re really lefties, howcum they don’t provide a service like the Vancouver Community Net? Sure, they’re incompetent ****wits, but they’re well-meaning incompetent ****wits who quite often manage to get free internet access to people who otherwise can’t afford it.

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                                                                • At 2006.05.12 13:18, raincoaster said:

                                                                  Try this list of Freenets around the world. There’s quite an assortment in the UK, so shop around.

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                                                                  • At 2006.05.12 13:55, Steven L said:

                                                                    Manxcat, are you by any chance related to John Prescott?

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                                                                    • At 2006.05.12 14:26, Steven L said:

                                                                      Psimon, all these ‘jobs’ they have created are either public sector non-jobs or soul destroying call centre jobs on slave-pay.

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                                                                      • At 2006.05.12 19:52, idlex said:

                                                                        By the way Mac I do see anarchy as the ultimate destination of humanity (I hope) but it will probably take another couple of million years of social evolution (or mass reprogramming) before it becomes a stable and viable option. Anarchy means ‘without leaders’ not ‘without order’. (Joe M)

                                                                        That’s pretty much my view.

                                                                        And belated best wishes to the Ancient Submariner. I’m sure he will surface again soon.

                                                                        Been a bit too busy to post the last few days.

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                                                                        • At 2006.05.12 20:24, Macarnie said:

                                                                          Thank you each and everyone for all the good wishes.
                                                                          The procedure was a failure, and I now sit at home since yesterday, long face , short vista.
                                                                          Today they have summoned me into hospital again to try to kill the cancer another way.

                                                                          Watch this space, let’s hope it gets filled again.

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                                                                          • At 2006.05.13 04:02, raincoaster said:

                                                                            Mac, I beat that bitch and I haven’t a quarter the strength you do. You’ll take that f**ker down on sheer force of character. Do what your doctor says, ask the nurses to fill in the blanks (there are many) and take care of yourself. If you need help, ask Melissa to pass on my email. I’ve been there, I can help.

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                                                                            • At 2006.05.13 04:44, idlex said:

                                                                              Rock on, Mac.

                                                                              You’re the man on Boris’ blog, and I listen to you above everybody.

                                                                              But we all fade away in the end.

                                                                              So write us some more poetry, while you’re still around to write poetry.

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                                                                              • At 2006.05.13 04:50, idlex said:

                                                                                Above everybody, including Boris.

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                                                                                • At 2006.05.13 09:57, Macarnie said:

                                                                                  Idlex et al, I class you all much higher than mere co-correspondents. I class you all , in the real sense , as ‘distant’ friends.( I’ll ask Melissa, raincoaster, thanks).

                                                                                  I might be down , but I’m not out yet, and to prove it to a chorus of groans: here is a ditty I composed for my surgeon, even before I got to know him intimately,( which was only last Wednesday).

                                                                                  From a patient to his surgeon / doctor.
                                                                                  —————————–
                                                                                  The theatre is your stamping ground, my body is your stage.
                                                                                  For you, one more performance; for me: my pass to age.
                                                                                  I’ve no wish to make a fuss, I could do without the strife
                                                                                  I need to know; with certainty, if I’ll survive the knife,
                                                                                  If it is to be the scalpel; I’d need to weigh the odds.
                                                                                  Never having been a gambler; the only law I trust is ” Sods”
                                                                                  I know you’d do your darndest to save me; come what may;
                                                                                  But you and I are actors, we didn’t write the play.
                                                                                  The critics publish what they think, once the acting’s done
                                                                                  But what’s the good of praise for you, if I, your stage, am gone?

                                                                                  There is a German saying; I hope not cogent to this point :
                                                                                  “Die Operation war einen kompletten Erfolg:
                                                                                  leider, der Patient starb”.
                                                                                  ( Operation a success , unfortunately the patient died).

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                                                                                  • At 2006.05.13 21:15, idlex said:

                                                                                    Tremendous, Mac!

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                                                                                    • At 2006.05.14 09:16, raincoaster said:

                                                                                      MAC, you’re still around. And you still KICK ASS.

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                                                                                      • At 2006.05.15 17:09, Steven L said:

                                                                                        I’m ashmaed to admit that I have rolled my mouse roller button thingy over Macarnies poetry up until now (English was never my subject).

                                                                                        But the above is a truely beautiful work of art.

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                                                                                        • At 2006.05.15 18:45, manxcat said:

                                                                                          Steven L. Are you by any chance related to Nick Griffin?

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                                                                                          • At 2006.05.16 13:07, Melissa said:

                                                                                            Idlex – cool dude – love it!

                                                                                            >Rock on, Mac.

                                                                                            You’re the man on Boris’ blog, and I listen to you above everybody.

                                                                                            Sure Raincoaster and Mac I’ll get you two together.

                                                                                            Mac, you really have been and continue to be a true friend/blog police/trusted adviser/inspirational writer and above all phenomenal poet! You cannot let anything stub out your overflowing energy we fervently hope and pray.

                                                                                            And what a poem Mac – you ace scholar!

                                                                                            We shall be rattling around this site looking for you while you are away Mac – please don’t be long. We shall be searching for you high and low and scratching away in every nook and cranny till you come back.

                                                                                            xxMAC, WE AWAIT YOUR RETURN TO FULL HEALTH: COME BACK TO OUR LOVING ARMS SOONxx

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                                                                                            • At 2006.05.16 13:11, Melissa said:

                                                                                              ps I know it sounds soppy but I do feel Mac is such a hero!

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                                                                                              • At 2006.05.16 13:47, Steven L said:

                                                                                                Manxcat

                                                                                                It’s not racist to discuss immigration and foreign policy you know.

                                                                                                There are parts of the commonwealth that we could actually make better, like Sri Lankan for instance. If we concentrated foreign policy and resources ending the civil war there and helping the country develop its tourist trade further it would really be of benefit to a lot of people.

                                                                                                The UK can’t solve Africas problems. Africa is all but a lost cause if you ask me. We should be looking at what is within our capabilities in terms of helping people abroad.

                                                                                                We could do a lot for our friends in Sri Lanka and Bangladesh for instance.

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                                                                                                • At 2006.05.20 13:23, Macarnie said:

                                                                                                  I am back out of the hospital, at least for now, and , fingers crossed, the tumours in my liver have been arrested in their growth. A CT scan next week will tell the latest chapter .

                                                                                                  I don’t feel too well , but I’m glad to be back amongst you lot again. I’ve missed you all. Will catch up soon.

                                                                                                  To Dr Bakir:

                                                                                                  Last week upon your table, the operation failed,
                                                                                                  With disappointment overwhelmed, I must admit, I wailed.
                                                                                                  But you Sir, in your own free time, worked out another way,
                                                                                                  There’s hope now, I, your living stage, will see another day.
                                                                                                  Your stage is part refurbished, and my perspective’s better.
                                                                                                  I promise, your instructions I will follow to the letter
                                                                                                  The story hasn’t ended yet; we’ll see, there’s more to come,
                                                                                                  I half believe in miracles, cogito ergo sum.

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                                                                                                  • At 2006.05.20 22:16, raincoaster said:

                                                                                                    Outstanding! *claps*

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                                                                                                    • At 2006.05.21 13:29, Melissa said:

                                                                                                      Good news Mac!

                                                                                                      Double *claps*

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